they judge Malia for dancing at a concert and they judge Sasha for having a summer job, you can never win as a black woman lmao
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Valentine’s Day.
It’s Valentine’s Day, and I know it can be pretty rough on single people… especially if you’ve recently gotten out of a relationship or if you’ve just been single for awhile.
Remember this: Not every relationship is golden and great and smooth sailing. Not everything you see on social media is real. We all like to post our best and brightest moments on social media. Humans don’t like to share our ugliest selves. So some of the photos of couples you’ve seen today may include photos of people in controlling or even abusive relationships. Some may be couples who aren’t supportive of each other. Some may have one who cheated on the other. Some may be currently going through some really hard arguments and tough decisions. Even if it isn’t an abusive relationship, maybe some are just not compatible. Shit happens and every couple goes through ups and downs… you really never know. Hold out for a person who actually complements you instead of a person that just feeds you compliments.
TL;DR: It is always better to be single than in a relationship with the wrong person.
April 2013 | September 2016
Since then, we’ve changed a lot. But we’re still pretty much the same.
#jeffrea
Actual good first-time college student advice:
- Wear jeans/pants that “breathe” and bring a sweater, even if it’s scorching hot out, until you know which building blasts the AC to 60 degrees F and which feels like a sauna
- Backpacks with thick straps are your friend! Messenger bags are cool and all but if you’re commuting with a lot of stuff, symmetrically styled backpacks are better for your back
- You are your own person and you can walk out whenever you need to or want to, so long as you’re not disrupting the class. Meaning you can go to the bathroom without permission, take a breather if you’re anxious, answer an important phone call, etc.
- If you don’t like the class on the first day, if you can- DROP THAT CLASS AND TAKE ANOTHER ONE! It’ll only get worse from there!
- If you can, take a class outside your major; it’s a good break from your expected studies.
- You are in charge of your schedule. Your adviser and guidance counselor is there to ‘advise and guide’ but if you don’t like certain classes and you can substitute for others, that’s your choice.
- Consequently, if you are changing anything drastic in your plan, talk with your adviser and instructors.
- Pay attention to your credit hours and grades. Never leave this to the last week of school, you will be sorry and stressed beyond belief!
- Unless it’s a lab book or otherwise specified, go to the class for a week or so before buying an expensive textbook. Some classes, while having it on their required list, do not actually use the textbook a whole lot and you might find some of it scanned online. Rent if you can or buy used online (schools actually don’t give discounts). Use your best judgement on what you think you need.
- Tell the people who go up to you selling or advertising things you are not interested in that you are in a rush to class and don’t have time to listen to them. It’s less rude and they’ll leave you alone.
- The smaller the class, the better it is to have some sort of acquaintanceship with a couple classmates. They might save your ass if you are absent one day or need to study. And talking with them makes the time go by faster without it being so insufferable.
- You don’t need to join a club or sport, but internships are cool and useful!
- If you can afford it, take a day off once or twice each semester if you’re too exhausted. Just be aware of what you missed and if it was worth missing!
- Your health is the most important, this goes for mental health too!! Note: College-age/upper teens is when mental disorders like depression and anxiety are most commonly diagnosed. Most schools have therapy services, especially during exam time. Look into it if you need to!
- Communicate with your professor if you are having trouble with something. Anything.
- Eat and stay hydrated. Bring a water bottle and snack to class.
- All-nighters will happen but never go over 36 hours without sleep.
- It’s going to be hard and there will be times you might think about giving up. This WILL happen. You just have to make sure what you’re doing isn’t making you absolutely miserable and/or there is something rewarding and positive to look forward to at the end!
I did none of this and it bit me in the ass every time so this is EXCELLENT ADVICE.
ADDITIONAL ADVICE
Don’t let a mental health day turn into a mental health week because you will be so screwed.
Pay attention to the syllabus and do not lose it. A lot of professors put all of the assignment due dates in there and ONLY in there.
If your school has blackboard or moodle etc. CHECK IT. a lot of professors will only post certain info there and not talk about it in class
Check your student email account weekly. A lot of it will be unimportant junk but sometimes it’s the only way professors will communicate.
Check your student email multiple times DAILY.
I’m having really hard panic attacks from the events of last night and people trying to tell me I was wrong when I clearly did nothing wrong.